My husband and I both felt God was calling us to homeschool. We spent at least a month researching on-line and talking with complete strangers to try and get a definitive answer. Seeing as God no longer speaks to us from a burning bush (I wish He would; it'd be so much easier!) I guess we were looking for someone to say, "Yes, this is God's calling for your family. You are doing the right thing and all will go well." Like that ever happens...
We finally came to the conclusion that it would take a leap of faith. Thus began our journey AND 6 months of preparation. So, here are my thoughts on what we did and what I wish we had done.
First, google homeschooling and your city. We found websites, blogs, co-ops and articles that kept us busy reading. Second to reading on the internet, I encourage you to go to the library and peruse the books they have on homeschooling. I think I found that more helpful than googling. My favorite book is Real-Life Homeschooling by Rhonda Barfield. She profiles 21 completely different homeschooling families. It's a real eye-opener and I wish I had read it back when I was starting. Keep in mind, not everything will appeal to you, but it helps to see all the possibilities. There are many forms of homeschooling: classical, traditional, un-schooling, ecclectic, montessori, waldorf, and probably more (I'll go more into that later). Finding the books on the subject and reading them and using them as a discussion tool between you and your spouse is very helpful as you strive to paint the emerging picture of what your homeschool will look like.
I was fortunate to know one or two homeschoolers in the area (if you don't, look on the websites of the co-ops and there should be some contact names and numbers/emails) and called them to "pick their brain." Homeschoolers are generally eager to help other families. We've all been there and we were all, at one time, filled with questions about it. These women I originally spoke to, in turn, would put me in touch with other homeschoolers. I had to have the guts to call complete strangers and ask for a little of their very limited time to help me by answering my questions. Talk about a thirst for knowledge; I was parched! Thankfully, they were all happy to help. Sometimes, I struggled to not feel overwhelmed by all the "make sure you do this" or the "it won't work if you" or "you have to" etc. All well-meaning, as is this blog, but my advice is to take everything with a grain of salt. Mull it over, discuss it with your spouse, and pray on it. What works for one family, may not be for you. You will have to sift through the abundance of information and find what is a good fit for your family. Understand, I have had to do this at least 3 times since we began this journey. As our family grew our needs and "flavor" changed.
Some thought needs to be given about where your schooling will take place. Some families have a school room; we never did. I didn't think it necessary when we started, but in retrospect, it would have been nice to have a room where everything is located and you can go and work and then leave at the end of the day. However, that being said, it is not necessary. We mostly did our school right at the kitchen table. When I was first pregnant with our 5th child, I was SO tired and we literally did our school work on my bed. I would prop myself up with pillows, my 4 kids would come in with their books, and we did school work right there on the bed. So, the size of your house may dictate whether you have a separate room, area of the basement, etc. or whether you get the work done at the kitchen table.
Wherever you homeschool, you are going to need to prepare for the onslaught of curriculum and supplies, etc. So, give some thought to space. We have always had bookshelves and each child has their own shelf where their books and supplies are kept. Then, we also have some common supplies available on my shelf; yes, I get my own shelf, too. I know one mom whose kids have desks in their room and their school supplies are all kept in their room. Take a look around your house and decide where you'll put all the books and things that you will be using. Even if you are un-schooling, you'll end up with magazine subscriptions, educational games, etc. that will need a place to "live" in your home.
Lastly, part of my preparation was to give some thought to how our life-style would change or be different from others. After we decided to jump into homeschooling in January of 2000, I went to a homeschool conference in March. I sat in on a talk for new homeschoolers and remember the woman (who was from Chicago and had homeschooled her dozens of kids for thousands of years) remark how it was difficult for her to give up her mornings with the ladies in the neighborhood. She had been in the habit of having coffee with the neighbors after the school-age kids got on the bus. She knew her decision to homeschool meant no more of that and with tears in her eyes, admitted it was the hardest sacrifice for her. I feel the same way. I am a social person and LOVE to get together with other moms and chat. So, I left that conference giving serious thought to how this decision would change our, and specifically my, lives. I've known other moms who lament giving up their time on the computer, quiet time, daytime t.v., and a clean house. Whatever difficult changes there will be, remember there will also be good changes. Your family will be closer. You will enjoy much more flexibility with your time and every day will be an Adventure!
One more thing. Set a time period. Especially if you are pulling your kids from traditional school, it is going to be an adjustment. I don't know if you are starting from the beginning if this is an issue at all. We committed to a year, but I've known people who commit to only a semester or less. I would strongly recommend that you give it AT LEAST a semester and preferrably a year.
In my next post, I'll talk more specifically about the realities of homeschooling. Sort of a "what to expect when you're expecting to homeschool." In the meantime, I hope some of this post gives you some food for thought and I encourage you to comment with specific questions you may have that I can address in subsequent posts. Thanks for reading!!
Musings on the daily trials and triumphs of a homeschool family.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Ask Why
Whether you have babies just getting ready for school or you have school age children that you are considering pulling out of their current school, you need to ask yourself, "Why?" Make sure you are clear about why you want to homeschool. People will never stop asking you why you do it and there will be days you wonder yourself, so you might as well be clear in your own mind about why.
My simple answer when people ask me why I homeschool, is: God called us to it. Behind that answer is a long story about when the seed was planted (before my first born was even conceived), how it was cultivated over the years, and the series of "coincidences" that led my husband and I to feel very definitely that God was calling us. Over the years, it's been important for me to always be able to point to why I homeschool. It is a lifestyle, a ministry, a full time job that goes against the grain. So, like any big decision it helps to be clear on why. (See my May 2012 post titled, How it all Began)
For me it was a calling, but I've heard many other reasons over the years. Travel, for instance. Military families that travel a lot or families that enjoy travel throughout the year find homeschooling is less stressful than changing schools or dealing with missed school. So, it could be that homeschooling is the answer to your traveling life-style.
Some families live in a school district that is struggling. Ask yourself, "Can I provide better than what's being offered?" Maybe you are unhappy about the choices for your kids. Are the schools in your area not preparing kids well/not safe/not affordable? I remember a mom I knew whose daughter was a little older than my oldest and when asked why she wasn't sending her daughter to preschool she said, "I think she'll do better with me." That was her "why" in a nut shell.
Another reason people homeschool is that they have or want a large family. Following the school schedule with car pools/activities/meetings can be exhausting when you have lots of little ones. Believe it or not, my life was more peaceful once I brought my kids home to school. We had four at the time (the oldest was 9 and the youngest was 2) and within that first year, I realized that I could see us having another child, where before, it seemed impossible!
During the years that I did not homeschool, often times I'd be at the park or at the grocery store and someone would ask me, "Do you homeschool?" I found it very frustrating. I couldn't understand what I was doing that complete strangers would ask me this (they themselves were homeschoolers). I think I know now. I really enjoy being with my kids and I naturally would keep them busy and engaged by turning outings and errands into opportunities to learn. I see it in other moms now, too. It was over Christmas break of 2000 that my husband and I were grappling with this decision. When the kids went back to school, I was in the parking lot and a mom I knew said to me from her car, "Well, THAT couldn't have come a day too soon!" She was so glad to have her boys back in school and it hit me....I was different. I was NOT happy that Christmas break was over. I loved having the kids home and not everyone feels that way. Maybe your reason for homeschooling is simply that you enjoy your kids.
Finally, in this decision making process, be willing to entertain "no." I've talked to many parents over the years who were struggling with the question of whether or not to homeschool. Some of them have decided to and some have not. Be willing to explore your options. Sometimes, there is another answer to the "problem" that is leading you to consider homeschooling. It's not for everyone, so be open to other answers. If, in the end, you can sum up in a sentence why you want to homeschool, you can be certain you got to the heart of it. AND, you'll be ready with an answer for each time you are asked!
I've been homeschooling now for 12 years and people who know me still ask why I do what I do. Of'course, strangers are also curious. It helps me to be clear in my own mind and that's why I encourage you to be clear in yours. Homeschooling, like anything that requires committment and hard work, has it's challenges and difficulties. It's during those times that I ask myself, "Why am I doing this?" I'm thankful I have an answer that renews my committment and keeps me focused!
Next - Preparation After the Decision.
My simple answer when people ask me why I homeschool, is: God called us to it. Behind that answer is a long story about when the seed was planted (before my first born was even conceived), how it was cultivated over the years, and the series of "coincidences" that led my husband and I to feel very definitely that God was calling us. Over the years, it's been important for me to always be able to point to why I homeschool. It is a lifestyle, a ministry, a full time job that goes against the grain. So, like any big decision it helps to be clear on why. (See my May 2012 post titled, How it all Began)
For me it was a calling, but I've heard many other reasons over the years. Travel, for instance. Military families that travel a lot or families that enjoy travel throughout the year find homeschooling is less stressful than changing schools or dealing with missed school. So, it could be that homeschooling is the answer to your traveling life-style.
Some families live in a school district that is struggling. Ask yourself, "Can I provide better than what's being offered?" Maybe you are unhappy about the choices for your kids. Are the schools in your area not preparing kids well/not safe/not affordable? I remember a mom I knew whose daughter was a little older than my oldest and when asked why she wasn't sending her daughter to preschool she said, "I think she'll do better with me." That was her "why" in a nut shell.
Another reason people homeschool is that they have or want a large family. Following the school schedule with car pools/activities/meetings can be exhausting when you have lots of little ones. Believe it or not, my life was more peaceful once I brought my kids home to school. We had four at the time (the oldest was 9 and the youngest was 2) and within that first year, I realized that I could see us having another child, where before, it seemed impossible!
During the years that I did not homeschool, often times I'd be at the park or at the grocery store and someone would ask me, "Do you homeschool?" I found it very frustrating. I couldn't understand what I was doing that complete strangers would ask me this (they themselves were homeschoolers). I think I know now. I really enjoy being with my kids and I naturally would keep them busy and engaged by turning outings and errands into opportunities to learn. I see it in other moms now, too. It was over Christmas break of 2000 that my husband and I were grappling with this decision. When the kids went back to school, I was in the parking lot and a mom I knew said to me from her car, "Well, THAT couldn't have come a day too soon!" She was so glad to have her boys back in school and it hit me....I was different. I was NOT happy that Christmas break was over. I loved having the kids home and not everyone feels that way. Maybe your reason for homeschooling is simply that you enjoy your kids.
Finally, in this decision making process, be willing to entertain "no." I've talked to many parents over the years who were struggling with the question of whether or not to homeschool. Some of them have decided to and some have not. Be willing to explore your options. Sometimes, there is another answer to the "problem" that is leading you to consider homeschooling. It's not for everyone, so be open to other answers. If, in the end, you can sum up in a sentence why you want to homeschool, you can be certain you got to the heart of it. AND, you'll be ready with an answer for each time you are asked!
I've been homeschooling now for 12 years and people who know me still ask why I do what I do. Of'course, strangers are also curious. It helps me to be clear in my own mind and that's why I encourage you to be clear in yours. Homeschooling, like anything that requires committment and hard work, has it's challenges and difficulties. It's during those times that I ask myself, "Why am I doing this?" I'm thankful I have an answer that renews my committment and keeps me focused!
Next - Preparation After the Decision.
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
New Focus
I have a new focus. When Jane and I started blogging, it was really to get her more computer saavy (mission accomplished). Somehow, I am now into this whole blogging thing, but never gave much thought as to the purpose of my blog. I find I like it, but in researching other blogs I see that I lack direction. To whom am I writing? What do I want to communicate? Today, I have decided the focus of this blog.
I am writing to those considering homeschooling or just curious about it. I want to help others who are thinking about it or have decided, but have a b-zillion questions. I want to share my experience so others may have a clearer picture of homeschooling. I hope that my insight may comfort others (does the decision to homeschool require comfort?) or assist them on their adventure!
I will be blogging for a while on the decision to homeschool. Then, I'm not sure; I may delve into the muddy waters of curriculum! Or Socialization (gasp!)....
I am writing to those considering homeschooling or just curious about it. I want to help others who are thinking about it or have decided, but have a b-zillion questions. I want to share my experience so others may have a clearer picture of homeschooling. I hope that my insight may comfort others (does the decision to homeschool require comfort?) or assist them on their adventure!
I will be blogging for a while on the decision to homeschool. Then, I'm not sure; I may delve into the muddy waters of curriculum! Or Socialization (gasp!)....
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Feelings
It's so hard getting back into things after the holidays. I feel like it's harder than after the summer. I don't know for sure why that is, but I suspect it has something to do with the dark, cold mornings.
This semester I'm feeling like a terrible homeschool mom. I don't think I'm spending near enough time with Ruth, my 9 year old. I just feel inadequate; spread too thin. She just troops along with her school work, but I spent so much more time with the other kids at that age. (Then, I hear a voice in my head and it tells me, "She's probably better off. She's learning to teach herself. She'll be more independent.") Maybe. I don't know. I miss the quiet days at the table. I miss the rhythm we used to have.
At times like these, times when I find myself constantly waiting for something to change (particularly to change back), I find it's time to say goodbye to a chapter in my life and realize I'm in a new chapter. I can look back on my homeschool career and see many chapters. They are all different and all were equally uncomfortable at the beginning. It's just with homeschooling, sometimes life dictates changes you don't expect/can't control. I can hear you all saying, "What? She didn't expect taking a 16-hour a week job to affect her homeschooling? Is she crazy??" Yeah..I did and I knew the ways in which it would change the rhythm of our days. But I guess I thought we'd settle into a new routine. It just seems like there are never any routine days.
So, this is the schedule for this semester:
Mondays: I work 7:30-4pm; Jane dances 6-7:30pm
Tuesdays: Jane has sewing 10-12:30; Jane demonstrates dance 4-5pm; Ruth dances 5-6pm and Sam usually works at the grocery store 5-9pm.
Wednesdays: I work 7:30-4pm; Jane dances 6-7:30pm.
Thursdays: Jane demonstrates dance 9:30-11:30am (I get the girls up after taking Sam to school and we go to Bread Company and do school work. My sister, Karen, usually meets us. Then we get home @noon and have lunch and continue with school work.) Jane has dance 7-9:15pm.
Fridays: Piano 9:30-10:30; co-op 11:15-3:30pm (I usually drop her off, except during February which is my month to help clean at the co-op so Ruth and I will stay and she'll do her school in the room designated for siblings); Ruth dances 5:15-6:15pm and I work the desk at that time.
Saturdays: I work the dance studio 10:30-2pm; Jane dances 10:45-12:15pm; Sam usually works an 8 hour shift Saturday or Sunday.
The challenge for me is to remember that these are the years I dreamed of. These are the years I am blessed with; truly. This is the stuff that, in remembering, will keep a smile on my face in my old age. I don't want to wish it away.
Another challenge is to not let my feelings of failure or inadequacy overwhelm or discourage me. So, at the co-op yesterday, Ruth and I were doing school work in the library. I was, as I say, feeling really discouraged. Then, as I'm doing math and english with Ruth over the course of the two hours, I realize that she's doing great! Yes, there's work to be done and I need to beef up her curriculum, but she's a smart girl and will be in her 4th grade books by April. My panic and concern is not undue, I just have to make sure it doesn't get the best of me. I need to renew my efforts with Ruth, but she's going to be fine. This is the clarity I wish I had in the early years. Homeschooling is a huge undertaking and it's so easy to panic or be discouraged. But homeschooling is a process and patience with the process is required. Here's a poem that began the 2nd Unit in Ruth's English textbook that I really liked:
This semester I'm feeling like a terrible homeschool mom. I don't think I'm spending near enough time with Ruth, my 9 year old. I just feel inadequate; spread too thin. She just troops along with her school work, but I spent so much more time with the other kids at that age. (Then, I hear a voice in my head and it tells me, "She's probably better off. She's learning to teach herself. She'll be more independent.") Maybe. I don't know. I miss the quiet days at the table. I miss the rhythm we used to have.
At times like these, times when I find myself constantly waiting for something to change (particularly to change back), I find it's time to say goodbye to a chapter in my life and realize I'm in a new chapter. I can look back on my homeschool career and see many chapters. They are all different and all were equally uncomfortable at the beginning. It's just with homeschooling, sometimes life dictates changes you don't expect/can't control. I can hear you all saying, "What? She didn't expect taking a 16-hour a week job to affect her homeschooling? Is she crazy??" Yeah..I did and I knew the ways in which it would change the rhythm of our days. But I guess I thought we'd settle into a new routine. It just seems like there are never any routine days.
So, this is the schedule for this semester:
Mondays: I work 7:30-4pm; Jane dances 6-7:30pm
Tuesdays: Jane has sewing 10-12:30; Jane demonstrates dance 4-5pm; Ruth dances 5-6pm and Sam usually works at the grocery store 5-9pm.
Wednesdays: I work 7:30-4pm; Jane dances 6-7:30pm.
Thursdays: Jane demonstrates dance 9:30-11:30am (I get the girls up after taking Sam to school and we go to Bread Company and do school work. My sister, Karen, usually meets us. Then we get home @noon and have lunch and continue with school work.) Jane has dance 7-9:15pm.
Fridays: Piano 9:30-10:30; co-op 11:15-3:30pm (I usually drop her off, except during February which is my month to help clean at the co-op so Ruth and I will stay and she'll do her school in the room designated for siblings); Ruth dances 5:15-6:15pm and I work the desk at that time.
Saturdays: I work the dance studio 10:30-2pm; Jane dances 10:45-12:15pm; Sam usually works an 8 hour shift Saturday or Sunday.
The challenge for me is to remember that these are the years I dreamed of. These are the years I am blessed with; truly. This is the stuff that, in remembering, will keep a smile on my face in my old age. I don't want to wish it away.
Another challenge is to not let my feelings of failure or inadequacy overwhelm or discourage me. So, at the co-op yesterday, Ruth and I were doing school work in the library. I was, as I say, feeling really discouraged. Then, as I'm doing math and english with Ruth over the course of the two hours, I realize that she's doing great! Yes, there's work to be done and I need to beef up her curriculum, but she's a smart girl and will be in her 4th grade books by April. My panic and concern is not undue, I just have to make sure it doesn't get the best of me. I need to renew my efforts with Ruth, but she's going to be fine. This is the clarity I wish I had in the early years. Homeschooling is a huge undertaking and it's so easy to panic or be discouraged. But homeschooling is a process and patience with the process is required. Here's a poem that began the 2nd Unit in Ruth's English textbook that I really liked:
Little by little, and straight and high
A bush to a tall tree grows.
Little by little, the days go by
And a bud becomes a rose.
Little by little, the children grow
Taller and taller and then,
Little by little, they change
And, lo, they turn into women and men.
We discussed how we can't rush some things; a lot of important things take time. We talked about how even though you can't always see it, big things are happening. How true. I learn SO much from my kids and from my homeschool adventure with them! There....I feel better!
Sunday, January 6, 2013
A New Year, New Beginnings
I love the new year. I do like to have a resolution. The way I see it, if you don't set a goal, you have nothing to reach for. My goal this year is to drink more water. I'm going to start with re-filling my tervis tumbler 3 times. I think it's 10oz. so that would be 40oz. of water a day. I don't know what they say you should drink, but that would be about 30oz. more than I currently drink. Improvement is the point, not perfection.
With our homeschool, we are looking at 3 month goals right now. The huge Catholic Curriculum Fair is the first weekend in April. Ruth will be ready for her 4th grade books. She already uses some 4th grade materials and she's in 5th grade Maps-n-Charts book (geography). So we wll be concentrating on wrapping things up for her during these next three months. I also will be planning some two week, in depth studies for her. She loves Greek Mythology so we are going to expand on that with history of Greece and some astrology. We will put together a greek menu for dinner to complete the series and I'm looking forward to that!
I can't help but feel restricted even by the little bit of school Jane does outside the home, at the co-op. We have grown so accustomed to moving at our own pace that I feel held back by the co-op. I need to ask Jane how she's feeling about it. This semester she continues with Biology at the co-op and begins two new semester classes, Speech and Writing and Organization Skills. Both taught by the same guy that taught her Logic and Memory Skills classes. She also is starting a sewing class at a co-op out in Chesterfield. She is NOT excited about it. I am struggling to get her to keep an open mind. She has a new portable machine (a nice one, not a toy) and a beautiful carrying 'bag' that reminds me of Mary Poppins' carpet bag. They're first project is a binder cover for a 1" binder. By the end of the semester, though, she will have made some "simple" clothing. The class is taught by a master seamstress and is FREE. It's out at the Pillar Foundation which is funded by several families. Their focus is on aiding parents in educating their children and they offer, for free (plus cost of materials), mostly history, economics, and civics courses. I plan on Jane taking some of their economics and civics courses. There is a link to their website at the bottom of my blog. I think I like them, I know I respect what they do, and we will see after our first experience with the course offering.
So, I'm going to be working a lot this month and I'm STILL recovering from my cold, but I am embracing all the promise that new beginnings bring!
With our homeschool, we are looking at 3 month goals right now. The huge Catholic Curriculum Fair is the first weekend in April. Ruth will be ready for her 4th grade books. She already uses some 4th grade materials and she's in 5th grade Maps-n-Charts book (geography). So we wll be concentrating on wrapping things up for her during these next three months. I also will be planning some two week, in depth studies for her. She loves Greek Mythology so we are going to expand on that with history of Greece and some astrology. We will put together a greek menu for dinner to complete the series and I'm looking forward to that!
I can't help but feel restricted even by the little bit of school Jane does outside the home, at the co-op. We have grown so accustomed to moving at our own pace that I feel held back by the co-op. I need to ask Jane how she's feeling about it. This semester she continues with Biology at the co-op and begins two new semester classes, Speech and Writing and Organization Skills. Both taught by the same guy that taught her Logic and Memory Skills classes. She also is starting a sewing class at a co-op out in Chesterfield. She is NOT excited about it. I am struggling to get her to keep an open mind. She has a new portable machine (a nice one, not a toy) and a beautiful carrying 'bag' that reminds me of Mary Poppins' carpet bag. They're first project is a binder cover for a 1" binder. By the end of the semester, though, she will have made some "simple" clothing. The class is taught by a master seamstress and is FREE. It's out at the Pillar Foundation which is funded by several families. Their focus is on aiding parents in educating their children and they offer, for free (plus cost of materials), mostly history, economics, and civics courses. I plan on Jane taking some of their economics and civics courses. There is a link to their website at the bottom of my blog. I think I like them, I know I respect what they do, and we will see after our first experience with the course offering.
So, I'm going to be working a lot this month and I'm STILL recovering from my cold, but I am embracing all the promise that new beginnings bring!
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